You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
