Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
