She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
