just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
