As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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