The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize