Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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