NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
So much rum. So many feels.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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