I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
