I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
