If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
