She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
false alarm, still single
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
