You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I enjoy the company of your penis
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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