So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
