She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
