please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
