If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Is it because I queefed?
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
