when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize