Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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