that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize