Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
