Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
