Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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