So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
