If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
