Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
