his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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