i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
