high people should be assigned attendants
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Randomize
