Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
