the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
