My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize