well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
