I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Randomize
