so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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