let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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