If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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