scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
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