It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
please come you make the beer taste better
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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