ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Randomize
