She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
