physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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