i may or may not be watching the land before time
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
