sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
