she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
