scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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