i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
