He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
