my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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