Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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